Erotica Generator - From 0 to Boobs in Fifteen Seconds
People like to write about boobs - no, people like other people to write about boobs.
It's a long standing frustration that a trivial song lyrics generator, which I wrote when I was at university, is just as popular, if not more popular than my carefully crafted unique and lengthy books.
Song Lyrics Generator and its sister sites, Plot Generator and Letter Generator, involve internet users picking a few keywords, from which a song, plot or letter is generated. The most commonly entered keywords are 'boobies', 'tits' and 'knob'. Some customers spend hours, trying to make Simon and Garfunkel songs sound pornographic.
In addition to this, two years ago, I bashed out a very short Kindle parody of the Fifty Shades series. I didn't use my usual pen name because firstly, I knew the short story would be misunderstood (the target audience was very specific) and secondly, it didn't fit in with my vision for writing career in general. However, despite me doing nothing to promote the book, there have been months when it's outsold all my other titles put together.
I came to realise that a vast number of internet users would rather read randomly generated plots and work derived from erotica derived from Twilight, than original fiction. If the content features boobs, even better.
It's frustrating when, every morning, I sit down to assemble the Indie Book Bargains newsletter, and have to sift through dozens of rippling torsos, bullying billionaires and dangerous vampires who happen to make great boyfrends. Don't get me wrong - I'm not judging the authors who write books targeted at people who enjoy the paranormal-romance/erotica genres; readers are buying those books in droves, and finding a market is key to being a commercially successful author.
And so I came up with www.erotica-generator.net.
It simultaneously mocks the formulaic nature of modern 'alpha male' erotica, and provides material for the people who want to generate meaningless skits about tits..
Erotica Generator turned out to be a joy to make. There's something very entertaining about writing '[heroine_firstname] finds herself unable to stop picturing [hero_firstname]'s huge [synonym_of_willy]. When devoid of passion, sexy talk sounds rather ridiculous and therefore makes me giggle.
Writing active phrases for the sixteen sex acts listed was challenging.
'gagging' => 'he gagged her',
'spanking' => 'he spanked her'
But 'animal role play' isn't quite so simple to work with.
Who would have thought that writing a trivial gimmick would be such a linguistic challenge?
I'm not expecting awards for Erotica Generator but, despite my frustrated remarks about random generators, it's actually quite good fun to mess around with. You can call your vampire Cecil and read about him torturing your heroine with a cotton reel - how can you say no to that?
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